To start off, I’ll admit it. I used to drink energy drinks. Most recently, a vodka Red Bull this past Halloween.

Give me a break. The night was still young, and there was no reason for me to be yawning at 10:00 PM.

Okay, maybe I had more than one vodka Red Bull. It was two and a quarter. I can’t quite remember, but it was definitely more than two and not more than five.

Well, maybe two and a quarter. I’m not saying two and a half because I dropped the cup before I could finish half the drink.

It shattered on the floor. I felt bad for a moment, the heat of embarrassment rushing to my face. I worried my cheeks would turn red, until I remembered I already had stripes of color in the pattern of a rainbow painted across them.

Then a new worry hit me. How was I going to get this face paint off? And please, God, don’t let it stain.

Anyway, energy drinks.

The whole concept of them kind of terrifies me. The way college students crack one open like it’s just a casual cup of coffee. Weird.

Maybe it’s just me, but caffeine and I don’t mix.

Chills. Shakes. Pacing. Sweating.

And worst of all, a racing heart.

To sum it up, my body doesn’t handle caffeine well. At least I’ll never have to worry about coffee stains on my teeth.

Oh, and by the way, the face paint did stain.